Kathleen was anxious about her upcoming presentation for an important work project. And like many of us, she can be a little short and snippy with her partner as her anxiety and stress gets ramped up. Her husband Carlos realized she’s been under a great deal of pressure, and this understanding helped give him perspective. He was (for the most part) able to remain emotionally centered while Kathleen’s anxiety and brusqueness increased. Continue reading →
“I guess I’m bored with the whole marriage…We no longer try anything fun together.” ~Claretta, married twelve years
“Our relationship problems center around the fact that we no longer excite each other.” ~Jonathan, dating his partner for almost five years
The above issues are not exclusive to troubled couples. No matter how much we love and admire and respect our spouse/partner, long-term relationships/marriages are vulnerable to growing stale. It’s an unshakable relationship truth that over time novelty dwindles and excitement fades. And as years pass, the mystery and thrill of mutual discovery is edged out by the familiarity and comfort of knowing each other fully. Continue reading →
You know the saying… A picture is worth a thousand words.
This is especially true when it comes to online dating sites.
Like it or not, we are visual beings. That’s why it is so important to have a great picture representing the real you online.
It is the key for opening the door to being contacted on dating sites.
Start by making sure whatever pictures you post show you smiling. No sour faces allowed. This is especially true for women. Men love a woman’s smile and it’s often the first thing they will notice about you. Continue reading →
Breakups are tough, there’s no way around it, and sometimes changing your look can be just the boost of self-esteem you need to nudge the healing process along. However when in the throes of intense post-breakup emotions, it can be easy to go overboard with changes in the interest of grabbing the attention of your ex (think Miley Cyrus’s weight loss, hair cut and barely-there wardrobe choices post-Liam Hemsworth split).
While I completely support using a breakup to evaluate and make some updates to your look, I want to make sure you’re not approaching Miley territory and instead adopting a less-is-more attitude to your makeover. I’ve revealed below a few Dating With Dignity breakup makeover dos and don’ts to channel your breakup emotions in a constructive way and become the 2.0 version of your amazing self. Continue reading →
It’s an important part of any fulfilling relationship or marriage, yet so many couples struggle in the sex department. I really love this blog from marriage counselors Carista Luminare, PhD. & Lion Goodman, who identify the emotional aspects it takes to connect on this level with your partner.
It’s a universal desire, driven by ancient brain circuits that drive procreation and our primitive needs to be held, seen, and loved. We want — and deserve — more pleasure and less stress. Sex can be enlivening, relaxing and fulfilling.
When you search for “sex advice” on the web, you’re offered 416 million websites to choose from. There is no shortage of people offering you help: thousands of experts offer trainings in how to jazz up your sex life. What’s missing, however, is something essential — the real foundation and fuel for the best sex: safety and security. Continue reading →
I am pretty sure everyone is aware that financial incompatibilities top the list of breakup reasons. I also know for a fact that many people do not address financial issues before they get married. Obviously, there is a disconnect here! This guest blog from psychologist Dr. Amy Wenzel is really important — love her ideas for how to broach this subject.
I have seen many couples in therapy who describe frequent arguing, violated expectations, and profound disappointment in one another and in the relationship — often in part because of financial issues. Financial conflicts that have been described to me include significant differences in spending habits, differences in the degree of tolerance for credit card debt, instances in which one partner allowed the other to have full control over the family’s finances and later learning that bad investments had been made, and even instances in which one partner had substantial debt that had not been disclosed to the other before becoming married. Continue reading →
The greatest love songs of all time are songs about relationships, but those relationships are highly idealistic. Picture Celine Dion singing about how she’s felt blissful every single minute of her love affair, and you’ll know what I mean. In love songs, there’s no such thing as a bad mood or traffic or telemarketers. Coming back to earth, most relationships aren’t perfect or lovey-dovey on an hour to hour basis. Most couples find themselves dealing with garden-variety relationship issues. But for men and women who are stuck in relationships which present a major power imbalance, it typically involves one of two factors. Continue reading →