By Lisa Copeland
As a dating coach, I speak with amazing women over 50 daily about their dating lives. They communicate the desperation they are feeling about ever finding a good man to share their lives with.
Online dating has become a tremendous source of frustration and failure for them. Many become despondent at the very thought of having to go back online after a relationship ends. In fact, quite a few have completely stopped dating because the constant rejection or disinterest from men over 50 has become too painful for them.
After asking a couple of questions about their dating lives, I’ve consistently found most women really don’t understand who these over-50 men are or what they are looking for in the women they’d like to date.
I’d like to share with you eight tips about men that you can start using right away. I’ve had clients use this advice and go from zero dates on their calendars to men falling over themselves to get to know these ladies better.
Tip 1. Appreciate a man for who he is.
Men are wonderful but they aren’t women. They don’t think like a woman, nor do they communicate like a woman. This means don’t expect a man to act like a woman or you’re guaranteed to be disappointed.
Tip 2. Men over 50 love when you bring their masculinity out in them.
They have no interest in competing with you. To them, that’s like dating a man. The key is learning to come into your true feminine power that compliments their masculine power.
Tip 3. Men show you love with their actions.
Hollywood has messed with our heads on this one. On the big screen, they show us men like Tom Cruise’s character in the movie, Jerry McGuire, professing his love with romantic speeches that end in the famous words, “You complete me.” Real men show you their love by cutting your grass and giving you their coat when you’re cold. If you expect love to come in words, you could be waiting a very long time.
Tip 4. Men want to give to you.
Let them open the door for you or change that light bulb you can’t reach. It makes them happy to please you. All they want in return is to be appreciated and thanked. If you do this, they’ll do anything you want, which leads us to Tip 5.
Tip 5. Don’t criticize the job a man is doing for you.
He’s doing his best and yes, you may be able to do it better or faster than he can but don’t. It makes him feel emasculated. If he has offered to do something for you, allow him to do it his way. Otherwise, the next time you ask for help, he’ll tell you to hire a handyman. He doesn’t want the aggravation of not being able to do anything right for you.
Tip 6. When you’re dating a man over 50, don’t place demands on how he must be or what he must do in order to date you.
Men tell me again and again how much they dislike profiles of women who demand nothing less than the best restaurants or a certain salary to date them. Men have had enough of the demands put on them at work and from ex’s. The last thing they want to do is meet yours before you’ve even gotten to know each other.
Tip 7. Don’t try and remodel a man by making him your pet project.
Either accept him for who he is or let him go and move on.
Tip 8. A lot of men over 50 are pretty insecure when it comes to asking you out.
Having been rejected time and time again by so many women, they aren’t too quick about putting themselves back in a vulnerable position unless it feels safe to do so. If you like a man, encourage him with eye contact, a warm smile or a flirt online to let them know you’re interested. Remember, men weren’t given a dating rule book with their divorce papers either. So be kind to them and understand that as scared as you feel about dating, most of them are too.
Lisa Copeland is the Dating Coach who makes dating over 50 fun and easy. Learn more about Lisa at www.FindAQualityMan.com.